The Shame of Proud Whoppers

The Proud Whopper is fucking gay. LOL. The rainbow flag wrapper says “we are all the same on the inside.” But is that true? If some people have AIDS, and other people don’t, are both groups the same on the inside?

Be Young & Shut Up

On June 26th, 2014, I participated in Trans March, in a loose sense of the word. I was around trans people. I marched. I helped my friend carry baked goods to Dolores Park and gave and received plenty of sweaty hugs and heard lots of people talk about safety, community, happiness. A sense of belonging. It was a nice atmosphere.

It was also my first exposure to Burger King’s limited edition “Proud Whopper”, a grotesque novelty on par with the rest of their illustriously gaseous menu. Stomping our way down Market Street, the slow rise of the banner for this rainbow flag-draped meat patty elicited a disgusted groan from our caravan of queer and trans marchers, a ripple of disgust that soured our good mood with something no amount of Tums could chase off.

The horrifying specter of “LGBT advertising.”

I really want to believe that “a burger has never made me cry…

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About mindweapon

A mind weapon riding along with Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse.
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5 Responses to The Shame of Proud Whoppers

  1. PureEvil cont. says:

    Wow. I am stunned by the level of ridiculousness. Where do they come up with this shit? Do you have to smoke or drink something in order to be able to do it? The spin-doctors must be laughing their asses off about this. I’m having an ice cream headache from the profound douchiness of this. Once again…WOW.

    • Landsknecht says:

      Around here BK is the most vile in a chain of grotesque fast food restaurants. (meaning it makes Mac-D’s seem sort of OK by comparison) It is pretty much shit alright, so that’s at least half of your questiuon answered!

      Good then! Feed it to the pillow biters!

  2. JB says:

    Does that come (cough) with extra mayo? Mmmm . . . what’s that special sauce?

    • mindweapon says:

      People of color and gays are often at odds. So we have poor people of color (often with anti-gay attitudes) serving Proud Whoppers to LGBT’s. What could possibly go wrong?

      • MW.Anon says:

        I’m again reminded of Sailer’s brilliant “KKKrazy Glue” expression. The only thing that holds them together is their hatred of heterosexual white males.

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